shaza:
looking at me,
i dont think you would think, that there is just so much
going on, in that little head of mine. or in fact,
going on inside that heart.
kegan:
then that time when i said that about you
kegan:
you still can deny :P


sometimes, there realy nothing that i am thinking of.
but sometimes there are soooo many thoughts of
just one particular topic.
roar!
i dont know how to explain.
as i've said.
i'm pretty complex okay! hhahahah(:

Given advice that was clearly wrong,
The type that seems to make me feel so right,

And there's nowhere left for me to turn,
Been caught in comprimising situations,
I should have learnt,
From all those times I didn't walk away,
When I knew that it was best to go,

Is it too late to show you the shape of my heart

11:34 AM

lies, lies and lies.
the haha and that smile on msn.
believe it?
hhaha.
and there u go again.
are u really haha-ing.
hahha.

okay at some parts i was.
i am smiling though.
but i do know inside, i know there is so much soul-searchin
that neeeds to be done.
and that the events of what happened today,
not to me, but the others,
are still affecting me.
alittle.
alot.
i dont know.

sometimes, i dont know if being a positive person
is a good thing or not.
like, i may seeem super heartless.
but really,
i'm not. i just seem that way.
like cause, maybe cause, i dont want to do anything abt it.
maybe because, i dont know what to do?

and i am so impress with savrina.
to think someone a gazillion miles away knew i was feeling miserable. impressive.
maybe thats why she is called my bestfriend?

Embrace the chaos of today, and grab up all those loose ends.
Lead with your heart.

Life is sweet -- but someone close to you doesn't get it.

11:18 AM

be in my shoes for just a day.
and you would realise it really isnt that easy, as it may look.
its prob the same way everyone feels.

so what i;m trying to say is,
nothing is as it seems.

looking at me,
i dont think you would think, that there is just so much
going on, in that little head of mine. or in fact,
going on inside that heart.

sometimes, i seem so heartless.
but its only because i neeed to stay strong.
if i dont, everything else would come crashing down.

sudden random calls from unknown people from a familiar number,
isnt a good sign.

i seeem to have made a few people's life quite miserable.
i never meant to.

today, was quite an exhausting day.
was going to do my tutorial.
but like its 1:30 now.

everything will be fine for me.
i know.
but will it be for them?
for him?

it isnt all that nice to be able to take away people's hearts.

and so, so many thoughts.
(:

10:24 AM

JALAN RAYA(: haha

12:20 AM

Sunday, October 28, 2007 »

its a rainy sunday afternoon(:
haha.
i woke up extremely late. no suprises.

trying to start on my work.however haha, this has beeen going on for the past three hours. and still no progress. haha.

MUST DO MY WORK!
NOW.

2:36 AM

Saturday, October 27, 2007 »

after quite some time, kishor and i met for dinner.
and yes, we do seee each other in school almost everyday.
BUT, its different la.

and like, finally it was something away from school.
anyway, the lovely vithya was also there.
hahha. she is so fun.

LJS for dinner, then to starbucks((:
and vithya and kishor have awesome taste.
like whenever i go to starbucks, i'd buy caramel frap only.
and oreo cheesecake soemtimes.
but the drinks they had ordered, so lovely(:

ahah anyway,
beeen having drama almost every single day.
drama night is this friday.
the only one thing i fear is that i might LAUGH during my scene.
its tough not to smile. and when i smile somehow i'd LAUGH.

i've beeen a good girl and i've beeen doing all my tutorials.
its a good start.

1:57 AM

Friday, October 26, 2007 »

and so. my scene with amin for drama night is hilarious.
so funny.
and like as if having a playboy bf in reality wasnt enough.
haha.

oh well, the scene was initially quite hard.
but now it has gotten better.

well, had an interesting night with germaine.
the trip back home, continued by the talk over chocolate sundae at mac(:

Someone close to you wants to know more about your inner thoughts, and they want the truth.
Do not candy-coat your feelings in an effort to make them seem more mainstream or acceptable.
What's the point of that?
You have to let it all come out without editing a word.

Letting yourself be emotionally exposed is difficult, but you can do it - and you should

7:29 AM

Thursday, October 25, 2007 »

It's one thing to be flexible, but it's quite another to let someone take advantage of your kindness!
speak up if you are feeling like a doormat. It's sad but true: Sometimes the only way to get respect is to demand it.

A quiet word to the right person will get you all the satisfaction you need.
Display the maturity that others lack.

5:30 AM

Thursday, October 18, 2007 »

and then things seem to be wrong again.

7:05 AM

Wednesday, October 10, 2007 »

i bought my first ever tappered jeans today.
i obviously find myself looking weird.
but well, must have variety right?
so yes, besides, i trust mavis's and shan's taste.
its white. haha

had drama. read through the script.
its very nice. and i;m very sure its going to be fun doing it.

the train journey with fadlul was quite entertaining.
haha. bugis with shan and mavis was good as well.
so many nice stuff.
and mavis is so damn pretty, you know?
like realy. trust me.

finally i went to the geylang bazaar.
and of all places i had to meeet RP ASHRAF.

hari raya is approaching,
this would mean the end of fasting month also approaching.
haha. and that also means, school's starting.
so am i happy?
haha(:

10:52 AM

Tuesday, October 09, 2007 »

oh dear, i've beeen singing alot.
(as you can seee, from my blog entries)

well, went to ecp coffee bean tonight to meeet
rajiv and manshya(:
the time spent there was good.
i find it really sweeet of rajiv to still
want to keeep in contact with us.

and like, so rajiv sent us home.
yes, he drives. and for a moment before entering his car,
i swear i was quite sceptical.
like "am i going to trust rajiv to drive me home?"
haha. but the drive back was fine.
though quite scary at the times he was speeding.
and come to think of it,

the only reason why i was scared is cause rajiv has a very small physique right? and hence, i still find him to be a small boy.
which he obviously isnt. hahah.

anyway.
the past few days at home,i must say,
hasnt been very favourable.
but it will get fine soon(:

its always like that.
so yes.

1:32 PM

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
You tell me your blue skies fade to grey
You tell me your passion's gone away

You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride

The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind

1:25 PM

Sunday, October 07, 2007 »

now i see
this is the way it's supposed to be
i met you and now i see
this is the way it should be

this is the way it should be for lovers
they shouldn't go it alone
it's not so good when you're on your own

so come to me
now we can be what we wanna be
i love you and now i see
this is the way it should be

2:48 PM

Saturday, October 06, 2007 »

drama was fun.
and very tiring too.
of all days of fasting, today i felt extermely thirsty.

so since i has only four hours of sleep
after drama i slept all the way till ard 6.
and then rushed to get ready to go for
louissa's cousin's party at grassroots club.

so who was there?
pravind,narash,vithya,me(:,nathiya, shree and louissa.
it was so much fun.
haha.
and to think me and vithya had intentions of going to club
after the party, thank god we saved our money.
haha. cause the dance floor was fun.
though at first we were shy):
haha. but nonetheless, we all enjoyed ourselves.
shree, louisa and vithya really fun to dance with.

kyle ravin's magic show was interesting,
to think i under-estimated his talent on maya.
aha.
vithya and i took a photo with the sangestra's(?) guy.
ahaha. damn funny.
and awkward
and thanks to narasimma baldevan
we had to take the photo THREE TIMES.hahha.


and like the guy, didnt know if he should hold us or not.
so that made it more weird.
haha

anyway. i came home at 1:15 u know.
i would have died if vithya didnt come home with me.
ahahha.
so away from scoldings(:
ahahha

what is a sleep-over if i slept right?
so we didnt sleep. we watched BOYS(tamil movie)
and oh yes and we talked.
ahah.

6:12 AM

Friday, October 05, 2007 »

had dinner at town with narash,pravind,vithya,
valerie and thiru.
at far east LJS(:

and then they came over to my place.
and we did the usual, looking through interesting
friendster profiles.
pravind always the leader.
haha

and there's so much cleanign going ard in the house.
roar!

6:33 AM

Thursday, October 04, 2007 »

and so, i was supposed to help kegan with maths.
however we ended up just having dinner at KFC.

for the first time, mac(the one near my place)
was so crowded.):
thats why we went to KFC.

the past two days havent been all merry.
but the thing is, noone would ever prob realise it.
which is a good thing.

oh yes, yesterday was my granddad's birthday.
he is 81 this year. and this is also prob his last birthday.
and the house was filled with two extreme auras.
very hard to explain. ahhaha

oh my god.
seeing couples everywhere is just so lovely.
like damn sweeet.
but i know i am not ready for anythig of that sort.
wont be, anytime sooner either.
but roar. i cant deny that it is definitely tempting(:
but NO!

7:58 AM

Tuesday, October 02, 2007 »

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUQMAN(:

anyway. the second day of the chalet was fun.
lets see.
we didnt really do anything much though.
haha.
but we did talk alot.to each other.

ELROY & SAJUI called. hahaa
(:

7:49 AM

Monday, October 01, 2007 »

class chalet begins today.

stayed up till 9 chatting with ahsan online.
was suppose to meet the class girls at tampiness at 145.
i woke up at 2,rushed to get ready.
and met them in time(:
and its amazing, how i possibly can do somthing like that.

so well, i finally pierced my nose today.
damn painful):
but its goood(:
even if you didnt want to tear, you would.
inevitable.
so tears streamed down my cheeks.
haha

and i recieved ahsan's card. pretty.
lovely.
and funny.thanks, for the card ahsan.

hmm. its october already.

8:13 PM